Cycling is good for your health. It is also a great sport to participate in, as long as your competitors aren't dosed-up to the eyeballs with banned substances, of course. A nice sport and pastime that is good for your health. I get that. But cyclists are also a menace. A bunch of law-breaking, risk-taking, life-threatening assholes, in fact.
When I was a kid at school, I took something called a Cycling Proficiency Test. At the time, it was something school kids aspired to, because it was a like a major stepping stone on the road to passing a driving test. Passing the Cycling Proficiency test was awesome. The basic rule of thumb for cycling was that the operator of a bicycle was pretty much bound by the same rules and laws used by the operator of a motor vehicle.
Apart from a few maniac cycle couriers in London, the people of Britain are pretty good about following these basic rules (which have now been superseded by more stringent standards). Not so here in the US! In this country, it is apparently normal to:
- Cycle on the wrong side of the road, against the flow of traffic.
- Cycle the wrong way down one-way streets.
- Ignore stop signs and traffic lights.
- Cycle on the sidewalk, often at high speed, and often across intersections.
- Cycle in packs, often 3 or 4 abreast.
- Cycle across the grass in public open spaces.
- Cut through or across private property to avoid traffic.
I'm not saying that all cyclists do these things - that would be an unfair generalization. I'm just saying that all of the cyclists I have seen since moving to this country do it, the disagreeable tossers. So here's a little message to the cyclists of America: If I happen to mow your ass down in my car because you failed to observe the basic (and fucking easy-to-learn) rules of the road, too fucking bad.